Saturday, August 27, 2011

Back on the mat, with clipped wings for sure:)

Mmm, bed rest and all. If u know bed rest and if u know meditation, u will know that being still is one of the most painful processes there is for the body. In fact, I believe sick people fall even more sick from being confined (research has confirmed this for the elderly with hip fractures, that bed rest often leads them gently to their death). Even when u sit in sukhasana for a while, u body will hurt from everywhere. So, when bed rest is advised, it must be understood wisely.
An injured knee must be allowed to heal... it can NOT  move normally. It MUST be absolutely protected. In fact, the wrong movement will cause something rather inconveniently dangerous called the unstable knee joint -- it is a joint which collapses suddenly, even after what may seem like normal healing. In class, one 18-year-old had it... It would be distressing to watch -- suddenly, in the midst of a perfect sun salute she will collapse suddenly, her knee buckling under her. For an yoga instructor, for whom movement is life, u can imagine how frightening it is to think that my knee could end up that way. So, yes, I am not foolish. So, I understand the issue completely and the dangerous implication of being foolhardy. However, I also believe the body (and mind disintegrates) slowly if your prone (or supine for long, unless u are seriously meditating).
So, yesterday gingerly returned to the mat, with the wobbly knee, hobbling on a walking stick and stuff. Did a modified pawanmuktasana series without any knee bending, with legs out. Today returned to a more organised course, still with just the pawan muktasana as warm-up, full course of pranayama (it is one of the most healing practices, for sure)  and tried my beloved Sivananda sequence, leaving out only the Dhanurasana (which needs knees to be bent) and did all of them modified to avoid any pressure on the knee. Feel fresher already. Of course, u need to be mad instructor to know which pose to take, which variation to attempt, and which muscle to use and which to avoid so as to avoid further damage to a delicately healing joint. So, this blog is not to advise this course for anybody. However, I am a yoga instructor because I believe movement heals. And I am trying to find out that, even more precisely, from my own wound.Understand if healing can be facilitated and how (even earlier, my life-long torturous affair with bronchitis was cured through yoga) . And I believe yoga heals. And it activates key acupressure points that fast forward healing. If I did not believe that I should not be a yoga instructor, na?
And also, now for some cathartic outburst. I had a lot of advice about the body telling me it is time to rest and for me to calm down. Pleeeese ... I am calm indeed. My life style is very calm, chosen, centered.  I chose my class timings, I avoid columns where managements nit pick, I avoid work when I need to go on retreat (no, my husband has never financially supported me, ever!). I avoid students who interfere with my sense of positivity, I have avoided private classes because they involve too much of sweet talk, I have avoided lucrative offers for yoga studio partnerships because they would interfere with my spiritual goals and so all my choices, so difficult,  keep me calm.
The idea of being calm, I think, people misunderstand this. It is not about being still. It is about the mind being focused. The body is irrelevant.
Sitting on your butt, or talking quietly is not calm. (One silly visitor came here and left a message, CALM DOWN instructor, may your meditation save you!! And other some such nonsense. ...this silly visitor is calm?? Somebody who is ordering me about in my personal space( ( I mean, the moral police in the garb of calmness, this one!!)   I have had absolutely silly, selfish  students who sound very soft, with an apparent calmness that hides really  warped thinking... calmness in such people can be deadly!! I have seen a lot of dangerous, very rude  people who are absolutely calm. Criminals are very calm. Serial murderers are calm.  I rather be quick-tongued, but settled in my mind, my choices, my life and my thinking. So, please all of you, stop  blathering about calmness, u -- who have no clue about it at all:)

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