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We all have our phases. The last one year has been a period of spiritual upheaval for me. It is the sort of crossroads you come to, where the you realize the theory of yoga has to finally pass into experience.
Birth of any sort can be traumatizing. We humans do not like to accept that we are passing through several little deaths and several new births, every few years. None of us are anything close to what we were as kids, yet we hang on to a sense of illusory continuum.
So, to let go of a lot of things that are conditioned into us, is what yoga is all about. There is a lot of embarrassment about seeing this aspect (so intrinsic to yoga), for obvious reasons, and a lot of it stemming from confused religio-spiritual interpretations of it.
But this is a very scientific thing -- if you know of Shroedinger's Cat, then reality is a relative thing. The cat -- in this very scientific paradox of quantum mechanics because of what is defined as a superposition - can be both dead or alive. (What did you guys study in schools, if you don't know this, really?!!!)
So, yes, what is sad could be joyous?! So, it means what is a separation can be a communion? You make some sort of a sense from this madness of appearances. In yogic philosophy, the jiva (the soul as you experience yourself now) is different from the atma (that is the soul that has passed ages). The latter in its separation from the cosmic soul makes tough choices. The conflict between these two - jiva and atma -- make the drama of your current life. You could die not knowing the subtext of this experience. That too would be a choice of your soul. But if there is a glimmer of awareness, you are lucky.
Then, you realize that everything else that you experience in this life is your soul's choice to make the jiva understand this. The purgatory, as it were. Karma, so blithely explained by many as tit-for-tat is not really that. Au contraire, it is the choice of you own soul to create tough spiritual choices so it can transcend and reach its destination faster. It is an impatient Olympic runner who has no patience for a plodding partner. The destination, the plodder, the super-runner, are all the same. The one who experiences no conflict between these several roles, understands yoga.
Some enlightened soul immediately understand how this paradox can exist. Others, aspiring, have to struggle. The practice of yoga makes lights up this passage of struggle. It clarifies.
So, no I have not attained moksha yet. But I get the idea of the karmic Schroedinger's cat, thanks to yoga.
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